My Sweet Night Ever♡

Tonight was a great night ever <3 I don't know where I'm must start to tell >.<

Kemaren emg capek bgt , habis teater langsung basket tanpa istirahat . Terakhir makan nasi jg jam 9 pagi waktu pelajarannya si Maman. Sebenernya sih abis pulang makan jg , tp ga makan nasi cuma jajanan doang.

Udah males bgt basket sebenernya , lg ada masalah sm aji . Sindir-sindiran bacot di twitter , sakit hati bgt rasanya. Galau bgt asli ga boong , ga mood mau latihan . Tapi disisi lain jg gue coba buat bersikap profesional-_- Udah niat bgt bawa alat-alat basket , sampe bawa deodorant :O

Untuk teater nya lumayan seru sampe nangisin kak ijah dan gue jg nangis sendiri-_- Tapi gue ragu masih bisa bertahan di teater ato engga :| Balik teater langsung caw basket di BKI , nebeng sama bagus . Bagus bawa moter gabisa woles , ngebut nge gas kenceng rem mendadak di belakang mobil . Gue udah deg-degan abis di boncengin sm bagus , berasa mau mati . Dan ternyata tadi siang gue baru tau kenapa bagus ga se ceria biasanya , bagus baru di putusin sm pacarnya yg udah 13 bulan tanpa sebab. Wajar aja sih dia kayak gitu , secara nyesek bgt di putusin tanpa sebab . Tapi gue jadi merasa gaenak dan merasa bersalah udah nebeng sm dia , gue jg keilangan bgt lawakan-lawakan dia . Ga heran kemaren gue berasa kurang srek .

Sampe BKI udah bener-bener drop abis gaada tenaga , apalagi harus ketemu aji . Capek , bete , down , galau semua nya awut-awutan jadi satu gue bawa ke lapangan. Biasanya gue niat bgt , tp kemaren mau liat aji aja udah gamau. Liat aji langsung tambah ruwet perasaan gue , di tambah gaada cellia inas sm yaya . Ga biasanya perasaan kayak gini gue bawa ke lapangan . Mau lirik aji dikit aja gaberani , apalagi deket-deket atou nyapa .

Waktu game jg tampang kak prila sm kak dhea gitu bgt , dan gue dapet sekelompok sm kakak kelas semua . Temen gaada , marahan sm aji , kajef jd cuek , diginiin pula . Saking ga tahannya sampe nangis jg . Gue kangen sm mereka bertiga :( Gue kangen makan , bercanda , main sm mereka lg :( Bagus kajef jd baik lg , dia bikin gue lebih lega bisa cerita . Kak febrian jg bisa buat gue balik moody :)

Gara-gara gue nanya nama kak febrian kajef jd cakin , teriak-teriak segala bilang ke orangnya jg-..- Teriak-teriak di pinggir lapangan , sambil bergaya konyol . Asli waloupun malu , gue berasa jd lebih lega .

Tapi waktu pulang mood gue down lg , gue kangen pulang bareng sm inas . Kemaren gue bener-bener gaada temen pulang , jd gue nebeng lg sm bagus smp depan komplek . Awalnya kalo gue naik angkot sendiri sih gapapa , tp ini udah jam 9 malem dan gue takut balik sendirian! Gue nunggu angkot lama bgt gaada >.< Gue mikir gue mau nenbeng aji tp gengsi dan jg biasanya aji bawa temen , gue milih nebeng aji jg karna dia searah sm gue .Mulai panik , ada jg angkot tp penuh . Gue lebih tenang seenggaknya ada angkot . Akhirnya beberapa angkot lewat tp gue tolak , gue lebih prefer nunggu aji berlama-lama asal gabalik sendirian . Lg nunggu aji ada kak batak sm ka ega unyuh bgt , dua kakak basket yg paling gue suka . Dia balik duluan sambil bilang atiati sm sabar :3 Seneng bgt di tegor sm kak batak :D

Dan beruntungnya gue aji lewat dengan sendiri ga nebengin orang , alhamdulillah ya O:) Sesuatu gue berani minta nebeng sm aji :o Aji emg baik bgt ternyata , waloupun dia nolak beratus-ratus kali dan gue paksa dengan semangat 45' minta anterin smp rumah . Gue gapapa yg penting udah di tebengin , naik motor berdua sm dia :) Tapi gue tetep nyadar diri ko karna dia udah punya pacar , gue bisa jaga jarak and keep this friendship selagi bisa . Gue mau ngubah sikap gue yg lenjeh , gabakal kayak yg udah-udah .

Sampe di rumah seneng bgt rasanya , gabisa ada yg bisa gantiin kesenengan gue :o Gue cek twitter dan cek ulang tweet dia yg itu , alhasil gue yg salah! Dia nyindir bukan buat gue , gue emg goblok bgt udah nuduh-nuduh dia yg engga-engga sedangkan dia gatau apa-apa . Sampe sekarang gue masih merasa bersalah bgt .

Most of all , i love you like a friend <33

Great Day

Today was a great day!!!!!!!

I feel so lucky even a** make me so bored . I've met Mutia , Cule , Setiadi , Amoy , Sabit , and Khalil :D It's unpredictable , I've met some important person in my life.

And the greatest things important today is , I know David's father! David's father is germany :3 I can't say anything , I'm so lucky today >.<

I hope someday I can meet with David again . I just want to know how was his day and what his doing.

Your My Beautiful Pain Ever

i was so wrong to think that i've moved on from you . i still can't do that until now , because it's not as simple as you said . did you know that i've lied to everyone that i've moved on from you? did you know that i hold my emotion and my sadness on my laugh? i do that because i still love you and i don't want to the world know the truth that i can't move on.

i've tried so hard to forgetting you , to hate you , to erase our memories but i can't .

your a beautiful mistakes that i ever do .

16 months and 3 days ago is a best day ever in my life , because that day is the first day we met . i always remember how cute your face when you make a joke with your friend and i'll always remember how can we meet :)

i miss your smile , i miss your messages , i miss your joke , i miss our fight but most of all i miss your care a lot!

i remember what i feel and how my expression when the first time you've ignore me . did you know that i still feel it? i think this wound will never be heal , but i never hate you cause' of it :) because it's made me learn. all your fault that you do to me is my fault , until all my friends have to hates you , i really sorry this isn't what i intended . i just sharing what i feel bout you . i know that you'll never understanding me but trust me i just want to be the best for you , i just want to make you comfortable beside of me :(

i always know what you've doing , where are you now because i know all your history live . i'm sorry if i've disturbing you , but i want to know how are you today .

I Love You David :)

I MISS YOU SO BADLY!

gue kira gue udah bisa move on dari david , gatau nya? aku kangen bgt vid sm kamu! tau gasih aku masih bisa loh nangisnangis buat kamu :) aku sayang bgt vid sm kamu!! gaada yg bisa gantiing :''

gue masih bisa nangis buat lo , kangen sm lo , nyarinyari informasi tentang lo . gue kangen :''' lo sih enak ga kangen gue ,hahaha lo aja sebel sm gue gimana mau kangen. gue emg sayang sm khalil tp sayang gue buat khalil ga kayak sayang gue buat lo , your the only one for me vid :')

gue ga mulukmuluk ko vid , lo peduli sm perasaan gue jg gue dah seneng ko . gue sakit loh vid di giniin , gue ga bersalah lo giniin. gue salah apa vid? gue udah diem kenapa malah lonya gini?lo gabakal bisa ngerti perasaan gue vid , yg bisa ngerti cm gue . semua org sayang sm lo , tp sayang gue ke lo lebih besar dari siapapun! 

unknown

i don't want to loosing you , but my heart says i must to be stronger to move on. i know i can , but not now! actually i'm not stronger person as you know , i'm a weak person . my head says I HATE YOU but my heart says I LOVE YOU! did you know that i always cry on my night? cry beside your laugh? i don't need your love i just need your care . i will never regret or say that i wish i'd never met you because "once upon a time" you were exactly what i needed. life too short and simple for anyone but not for me , i make it hard because i'm weak when i see you. To be your friend was all I ever wanted, to be your lover was all I ever dreamed. you never know that your name is in every page of my diary , i wish you do the same but that's so impossible . people say NOTHING IMPOSSIBLE but i says IMPOSSIBLE TO MAKE YOU BE MINE. i wish i could tell you the truth , but it's popping on my throat . you killing me inside! but i never mind it , it's okay even it's make me insane :D my fake smile can hide all my tears , because i don't want people hate you . i never hate you , i just disappointed .my heart was taken by you, broken by you and now is in pieces because of you .i don't know a God that would allow us to meet when there is no way for us to be together . for me your smile is a perfect smile in the world even your smile must be all my tears . you never understand me because you never know how i feel.I'm falling for you. Hope you'll catch me. Cause I know it'll hurt so badly if you don't. i'm just stranger for you i know when you said "we're just friend" it's killing me inside it's the reason why i always stay away from you you hurt me over and over but feel as if sorry is enough to get you back in my life. you lie to me and tell me that you got my back reality you don't. a pain never make me give up , but your words just stop my breath. Rest In Peace for my heart . you stole my heart and never give it back , then you broke it and throw it like you never know what i feel! i wish i have a heart attack then die in front of you . i want to see you what will you do if i die today . leave me in the dark or cry and shout you never want to loosing me? exactly you'll leave me in the dark , i don't mind. but please say thanks to me for all my tears to you! 

random

love just a word , even it's just a word it has a thousands mean. a word who always reminds me of you , a word who always make me cry , a word who always make me smile , a word who always make me disappointed and a word who always make me understand how i can be friend with you :)

heart just a symbol , a symbol has a thousands mean . a symbol who always can feel how i can love you , a symbol who always make me fall in love , a symbol who always make me hurt and a symbol who always make me still love you .

i love you because my head says , i love you because my heart can feel it , i love you because you let me know how lovely you are , and i love you because it's make me smile on my sadness :)

a thousands thank you for you :) thank you for made my day like a rainbow , thank you you made me cry like a kid , thank you  you made me understand about a real life , thank you you made me scream like a crazy person , thank you you make me insane , and thank you you make me happy when first time we met :)

 

thank you so much you ever touch my heart :)

me and david (?)

erkhm , ini yg namanya david ya tepatnya David Nugroho . Nugroho nya ngeganggu abis u,u #abaikan 7 february 1996 anak pertama dari dua bersaudara . actually dia anak semata wayang , tp dia baru punya ade cwek 1 thn beda jauh bgt jarak umurnya :O ade tirinya. oke kita ke bio david =>
David Nugroho , bokap nya bule asli . gue ga tau tepat org mana , beno blg org prancis :/ khalil blg org italy :/ trus the last lika blg org belanda oke ga terlalu mikirin yg penting bokapnya bule!! seluruh angkatannya udah tau sejarah hidup dia :O dia di tinggal bokapnya dan ga balik lg alhasil khalil blg "MAKNYA CERE TRUS KAWIN LG" #khalilstyle dan lahir lah adenya itu u,u

kalo di photo dia selalu aib!! sebelum lo ketemu dia lo bakal blg kalo david jelek , lo salah guys . kalo dari photo emg jelek gue akuin , tp kalo aslinya lo bakal suka sm dia!! ga heran kl bnyk cwek yg syg sm dia termasuk gue :/ gue akan describing sedikit about fisik dia =>
muka bule bgt , smp khalil blg di ganteng #seingetgue dan kakak-kakak an nya david si ibenk #kataagustin bilang jg kalo david ganteng dan bule . emg!! bkpnya aja bule -_- kurus yahhh lumayan lah , hmm tingginya -_____- ga nahan!! tinggi bgt! taik gue ngiri sama badanya dia u,u gue aja cuma sepundak!! swt , oke gue pendek v.v' maklum aja dia perfect menurut gue . cuma judesnya itu yg ga gue suka! tinggi BGT , putih , slim , ganteng , cute , bule , athlete , tajir #iguess and a lots dan intinya dia perfect walopun hidupnya kurang beruntung :O

oke guys lanjut =>
david anak volley di 226 , dan gue ketemu dia di 85 waktu proseni di 85 walopun cuma cadangan gue beruntung bisa ketemu sama dia :') bernomor punggung tujuh dan plg keren di antara semua temennya #menururtgue gue langsung suka dan jatuh cinta pada pandangan pertama sm dia!! #lebe tp gue serius gue inget tuh tanggalnya!! 17 april 2010 cuy! dan rasa syg gue ke dia masih awet sampe sekarang , dan mungkin akan berlanjut ato bakal hilang :/ gatau pasti intinya gue hanya ngejalanin apa yg gue rasain sekarang tanpa harus mikirin apa yg bakal terjadi besok :)

seenggaknya gue hebat , gue kuat sm perasaan gue ke dia . secara hampir satu thn gue mendam rasa ini!! beda sekolah , jrg sms an , dia jg jrg aktif di dunia maya (lbh aktif di dunia dhani (?) lmao) , dan kalo ketemu jg jrg bgt plg engga kalo gue lg les karna tmpt les gue deket sm sekolahnya .

saat plg nyesek dlm hidup gue pada saat dimana pertama kalinya lg gue ketemu dia malah waktu dia mau tawuran , gue nangis #ngaku ya iyalah mau gimana pun tawuran kan bahaya!! ngapain jg dia ikut begituan? cwok emg kayak gitu bandel u,u david di situ yg lg jongkok di pinggiran make tas selempang . gue apal bgt mukanya :O gue tau dia suka tawuran dari khalil smp gue tau rokok yg sering di hmm di .... apa yo namanya :/ pokoknya yg sering di beli !! gue lupa merknya :/ gue tau semua bio nya david jg dari khalil , makasih yoooo paps :) karna khalil jg yg memperkenalkan david sejauh ini u,u